Addressing conflict in the team before it gets expensive

Most team conflicts start with a question of substance and quietly move to the relationship level. Two people then appear to argue about a tool, an approach or a priority, while the core is recognition, ownership or an old injury.

As long as the discussion continues on the level of substance, the group finds no solution. Every argument is correct and still nothing moves. That is the most reliable sign that the real question lies elsewhere.

As a manager you are part of the system. If you are involved in the conflict yourself, or if one side is closer to you, any facilitation reads as taking sides even when it is not.

That is when someone from outside pays off: facilitating a clarifying conversation, running a team day with everyone involved, or sparring with you alone before you have the conversation yourself.

In team development the whole team is in the room. Before the workshop I speak with the team lead and with parts of the team so that I know the subject before the day starts. In the room we work on the team's cases, with clear rules for the conversation and with agreements at the end that apply to everyone.